April 1, 2004 – by Per Christensson
After seeing Apple's overwhelmingly successful iPod and iPod mini take over the personal music player market, Microsoft has decided to get in the game as well. The company announced plans to introduce the "Portable Media Center" (PMC) in the coming months. The pocket-size device was originally developed to play music, movies, and television. However, in recent weeks, the company announced a revision to the PMC that takes the technology to a completely new level. "The new media player will not only be able to play all your media files, but will also be able to make you coffee in the morning," explained a Microsoft spokesman. Representatives from the company declined to comment on how the technology would be implemented in such a small device.
Not content to stand on its heels, Apple Computer announced the next revision to the iPod, called the "iPod Macro." The upcoming iPod will not only play songs, but will also make coffee, tea, and include a built-in toaster. Griffin Technologies, a popular Apple accessory manufacturer, is reportedly working on a baby monitor adapter for the iPod Macro. The adapter will allow busy parents to listen to their baby in another room while simultaneously grooving to the latest Nora Jones tracks. The device is said to be only 3mm thicker and 4mm wider than the current iPod, but will weigh roughly 18 pounds.
After hearing the buzz about the two companys' pretentious portable player plans, Sony Corporation also decided to get in the action. The electronics giant announced plans for the new "Media Monster" device, which has been described as the Leatherman® of portable media players. According to a Sony representative, the new gadget will play MP3, AAC, WAV, and AIFF audio files as well as stream audio from regular radio frequencies, satellite radio, and the Internet. The device will also play all types of digital video formats and will support DVD, VHS, and even Beta. It can make coffee, tea, toast, can process cheese, and can serve as both a refrigerator and an oven. Sony claims the device can also be folded up and used as a football. Pressing a special code on the football will transform the device into an electronic dog that responds to commands, performs tricks, and avoids obstacles when it walks.
All three companies declined to provide release dates for the products.